Monday, October 10, 2011

By Faith: How the Life of Faith Deals with Conflict


Genesis 13:1–18

Introduction

Through experience I have learned that a great deal of conflict that occurs within the family of faith is often among church staff members. There’s the story about the friction between one pastor and his music director—conflict that was so great it spilled out into the worship service.
One Sunday the pastor preached on total commitment to the Lord, and the music minister followed with the congregation singing “I Shall Not Be Moved.” The next Sunday the pastor preached on giving and how God’s people should give generously to the Lord. The disgruntled music director led the congregation in “Jesus Paid it All.” The following Sunday the pastor preached on gossip and the need to control the tongue, and the music leader followed with “I Love to Tell the Story.”
At this point the pastor was frustrated and he told the church that he was considering resigning on the next Sunday. The music leader then led the song “Oh, Why Not Tonight.” The following Sunday the pastor stood in the pulpit and said, “Jesus led me to this church and it is Jesus who is leading me away.” The song leader’s selection that day was “What a Friend We Have in Jesus.”
Our study of the life of Abram will teach God’s people how to deal with conflict when it comes our way. The lessons we will learn in this chapter of Abram’s journey of faith are in stark contrast to those we learned in the previous chapter when Abram failed to trust the Lord. Now we are going to learn from Abram’s ability to trust in the Lord in the midst of friction and conflict. Why such a stark contrast between the two narratives? What was the source of Abram’s previous failure and his upcoming success?
Both Abram’s success and his failure in the life of faith hinged on one crucial ingredient: fellowship with the Lord. As we noticed in the verses we’ve studied so far, the key ingredient missing in Abram’s failure was the altar of the Lord. Worship, fellowship, and communication with the Lord were non-existent in Genesis 12:10–20. But not so in Genesis 13.
The Lord, faithful to discipline Abram’s faltering faith and deliver him from the situation, was also faithful to direct him back to where he needed to be. “He went on his journeys from the Negev as far as Bethel, to the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Bethel and Ai, to the place of the altar which he had made there formerly; and there Abram called upon the name of the Lord” (Genesis 13:3–4).
God brought Abram back to where he needed to be in the first place: the altar of the Lord. If Abram were going to have success and keep his faith from faltering, he would need to maintain constant worship of and fellowship and communication with the Lord. Let’s see it in practice now.
Genesis 13 begins with Abram at the altar and ends with him at the altar. “He went on his journeys from the Negev as far as Bethel, to the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Bethel and Ai, to the place of the altar which he had made there formerly; and there Abram called on the name of the LORD” (Genesis 13:3–4, emphasis added). Also, “Then Abram moved his tent and came and dwelt by the oaks of Mamre, which are in Hebron, and there he built an altar to the Lord” (Genesis 13:18, emphasis added). The key to success in the life of faith is constant communion with the Lord. This steadfast fellowship with the Lord will give Abram success as he faces friction within the family. His success in dealing with this strife can teach us how to deal with conflict. But before we learn how to deal with conflict, we must come to grips with the fact that conflict is inevitable, even within the family of faith.

Conflict Will Be Experienced
within the Family of Faith

The following verses set the scene, as we understand the nature of the conflict that is experienced between uncle and nephew. Verses 5 and 6 reveal the source of the conflict.
Now Lot, who went with Abram, also had flocks and herds and tents. And the land could not sustain them while dwelling together, for their possessions were so great that they were not able to remain together. And there was strife between the herdsmen of Abram’s livestock and the herdsman of Lot’s livestock. Now the Canaanite and the Perizzite were dwelling then in the Land. (Genesis 13:5–7)

The Source of the Conflict

We are told in verse 5 that Lot was with Abram when he went into Egypt. Some have argued that the phrase, “who went with Abram” is artificial and was placed there only to make it appear that Lot was in Egypt. They argue this on the basis that Lot is not mentioned in verses 10 through 20. However, the absence of Lot in the previous narrative was because he was not a central figure of the situation. The main characters in those verses were Abram, Sarai, and Pharaoh.
While Lot was in Egypt with his uncle, he was able to observe first hand his uncle’s faltering faith. He saw his uncle put his own interest before his wife’s. Lot watched as his uncle took things into his own hands, walking by sight rather than by faith. What Lot witnessed of his uncle’s faltering faith would have an effect on the choices he would make.
Our text not only implicitly declares that Lot was able to witness Abram’s faltering faith, but it also explicitly states that the blessings given to Abram were conferred upon Lot as well. Verse 5 reveals that Lot also had “flocks and herds and tents.” Lot profited by the illegitimate blessings gained by his uncle.
The blessings Abram and Lot enjoyed came about by Abram not trusting in God, taking things into his own hands, and lying and scheming to save his own life, while forgetting about the danger that he put his wife in, and even the danger he put his nephew in. These illegitimate blessings that Abram and Lot received would become a source of conflict within the family.
The reason for contention within the family is revealed in verse 6, “And the land could not sustain them while dwelling together, for their possessions were so great that they were not able to remain together.” Abram and Lot were so prosperous that the land of promise given by the Lord would not supply all they needed. For all their livestock, Abram and Lot had an inadequate supply of pasturage and water.[1] Because Abram and Lot were not the only ones dwelling in the land (they shared the land with the Canaanites and Perizzites, v. 7), the availability of pastureland and water was limited. The result of limited natural resources caused problems, “And there was strife between the herdsmen of Abram and the herdsmen of Lot” (v. 7). Prosperity did not bring comfort to the family, instead it brought conflict, which began between Abram and Lot’s herdsmen.
There is something very interesting in these verses that I want to point out. It was back in Genesis 12:10 that Abram, who was exactly where God wanted him to be, experienced famine in the land. Back in Genesis 12:16 Abram was in Egypt where God did not want him, yet everything went well for him there. And here in verses 5 and 6 of Genesis 13, Abram is exactly where God wants him, but now he is facing conflict within the family. Even when we do exactly what God wants, he allows trials. This passage of Scripture shows the Lord sending another challenging circumstance Abram’s way to test his faith. This time, Abram will pass the test.[2]
Just as conflict was experienced in the family of Abram, we will also experience contention in the church. The sources of conflict are many, but the need to deal with them in a way consistent with the life of faith is paramount. The family of faith suffers serious implications when we do not deal with conflict in a biblical manner.

The Seriousness of the Conflict

The seriousness of conflict is implied in verse 7, “Now the Canaanite and the Perizzite were dwelling then in the land.” This verse not only declares the reason for the land’s inability to sustain Abram and Lot’s livestock, but it also reveals the dangers that take place when there is strife within the family. The first serious consequence of conflict is that the family of faith will become ineffective and vulnerable.[3]
When the Lord called Abram to leave his country, he called him to leave a peaceful country and go to a land that would be filled with hostility. There would be people in the land who would be enemies of Abram and his descendants; the Canaanites and the Perizzites were those enemies.
Internal conflict among Abram’s relatives would weaken the family and leave them ineffective and vulnerable in fighting the true enemy at hand. The battle that God’s people are to be fighting is not on the inside, but on the outside. When conflict abounds within the family of faith it weakens the family’s effectiveness in fulfilling God’s purpose and plan, which is to bless all the families of the earth with the good news of salvation found in Christ.
A father asked his young son to break a bundle of sticks. The boy raised the bundle off the ground and smashed it with his knee leaving the bundle unbroken and his knee bruised. He then took the bundle and set it against the wall and stomped on it with his foot, but the bundle still did not break. He came back to his father frustrated from the chore that his father had given him. The father, seeing the boy’s frustration, took the bundle of sticks and untied it. He then took the sticks and broke them easily, one at a time. When the family of faith is united they are strong and effective, but a divided family of faith is weak and ineffective for the work of the Lord.[4]
Another serious implication of conflict is that it makes the family of faith repulsive. Abram was to be a blessing bearer to the world. He was to carry the light of the one true God to the pagan nations. Conflict within his family could hinder the testimony of God’s people. Conflict over material possessions was a poor testimony to the ungodly Canaanites in the land. Likewise, when conflict abounds in the church, it gives an appalling testimony to the ungodly outside the church.[5] Nobody in his or her right mind would want to be a part of such a situation.
The world is looking for a safe haven, a place where peace and love abounds, and that place must be the family of faith, that place must be the church of Jesus Christ. People should come and experience the love and acceptance of Christ when they come to the family of faith, not the constant bickering and conflict. And while conflict is inevitably experienced within the church family, believers must resolve the conflict in a manner consistent with the life of faith.

Resolve Conflict in a
Manner Consistent with a Life of Faith

Abram’s conflict would put his faith to the test once again, but this time his faith would flourish, not falter. Abram would trust the Lord to take care of him in the midst of this test, rather than to take things into his own hands. His response to the conflict is consistent with those who trust in the Lord to take care of them. The first quality we see in the life of Abram that is consistent with the life of faith is the desire of a peaceful resolution.

The Life of Faith Desires a Peaceful Resolution

So Abram said to Lot, “Please let there be no strife between you and me, nor between my herdsmen and your herdsmen, for we are brothers.” (Genesis 13:8)
Abram’s desire in the midst of this conflict is a peaceful resolution. Though the previous verse (v. 7) spoke of the strife only being between the herdsmen, Abram understood that this conflict would spill over into the family. Therefore, Abram pleaded with Lot for a peaceful solution, knowing there could be serious repercussions if the conflict was not dealt with properly. He knew that it could weaken the family, make them vulnerable to their real enemies, and that the testimony of the Lord could be hindered. These are great reasons for dealing with conflict, but Abram gave the paramount reason at the end of verse 8.
The most significant reason that Abram sought a peaceful settlement is stated in the prepositional phrase “for we are brothers.” Abram did not say that he and Lot were brothers in the literal sense, for we know that Abram was Lot’s uncle. Abram used the word “brother” to declare their close relationship to one another. That Abram and Lot were family was reason to seek a peaceful resolution. Yes, it is valuable to pursue peace for the sake effectiveness, and it is worthy to seek peace for the sake of testimony, but more importantly, it is necessary to seek a peace to maintain the family bond.
We who are a part of the family of God are brothers and sisters in Christ. We are in a relationship with one another that will last throughout eternity. Therefore, since we are bound together by the blood of Christ, we must seek a peaceful outcome when conflict arises. Jesus said, “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God” (Matthew 5:9).
One story has it that during the Civil War, the North and the South were camped on opposite sides of the Potomac River. The Union soldiers would play a patriotic tune that was dear to their hearts. In response, the Confederate soldiers would play a patriotic tune precious to southerners. Then one of the bands started to play the tune “Home, Sweet, Home.” The other side stopped its musical composition and joined in. Soon after that you could hear voices from both sides singing, “There is no place like home.”[6]
Though division existed between the Union and Confederate soldiers, the song reminded them that their home and their destiny were the same. Likewise, members of God’s family must remember that as brothers and sister we have the same eternal home; therefore, we must desire a peaceful resolution when conflict arises.

The Life of Faith Initiates a Peaceful Resolution

Abram not only desired a peaceful resolution to the situation, but he also took the initiative to bring it about. How did Abram take the initiative? He put his total trust in the Lord to take care of his needs as implied in Genesis 13:9, “Is not the whole land before you? Please separate from me; if to the left, then I will go to the right, or if to the right, then I will go to the left.”
Abram could have demanded his rights regarding who goes where. After all, he was the uncle, the elder, and God had given him the land. Abram could have told Lot exactly what to do, but he didn’t. This time, Abram put God first in his life. He had learned a great lesson in Egypt: trust the Lord in all situations. Because Abram put God first and trusted in the Lord to take care of him, he was able to put others second and still take care of their needs.[7]
William Booth, the founder of the Salvation Army, became very sick in his latter years—so sick that he was unable to attend the annual Salvation Army conferences. Each year Booth would send a message to be read to the delegates. One time he sent a simple message that read, “Others.” The philosophy of the Salvation Army was to look out for the interest of others.[8] All Christians need the same attitude. Paul told the Philippians to “not merely look out for [their] own personal interests, but also for the interests of others” (Philippians 2:4).
When God’s people put God first and trust him to take care of their needs, it is revealed in selfless living. The Lord Jesus Christ is the greatest example of one who demonstrated total trust in the Lord and unselfish living. He was entitled to demand his rights, but instead he suffered at the hands of sinful men for the sake of others. He emptied himself of his glory, became a servant, and was obedient unto death. Christ trusted in the Father to take care of him, he put others first, and the Father exalted him. And now every knee should bow and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord (Philippians 2:5–11).
Abram’s total reliance on the Lord and his self-sacrificing living is contrasted with Lot’s distrust in the Lord and his selfish ways. Lot’s choice in verses 10–11 resemble the choice that his uncle made when he went into Egypt. Like his uncle, Lot would choose based on sight instead of faith.
When Abram gave Lot the choice, the proper godly response would be to defer to his elder uncle. “Lot lifted up his eyes and saw all the valley of the Jordan.” Instead of deferring to the true warranted rights of his uncle, Lot looked out only for himself instead of putting God first and others second.
What did Lot see when he lifted up his eyes and gazed upon the valley of the Jordan? The text says that Lot saw that “it was well watered everywhere—this was before the Lord destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah—like the garden of the Lord, like the land of Egypt as you go to Zoar” (v. 10). At a glance, what Lot saw looked profitable and appealing, but we’ll soon see that it would not be beneficial at all.
Verse 10 forewarns the readers that Lot’s self-gratifying and self-seeking response would bring blessings, but those blessings would be temporal.[9] Nestled within the description of what Lot saw is the statement, “this was before the Lord destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah.” Lot was seeking to take care of himself without the Lord’s help, and his self-centered choice would bring disaster. “So Lot chose for himself all the valley of the Jordan, and Lot journeyed eastward” (v. 11). Lot’s choice was all about himself; he exhibited no concern for his uncle. One scholar commented, “Lot selfishly intends to advantage himself by disadvantaging his uncle.”[10]
It is significant to notice that when Lot made his choice he “journeyed eastward.” Since the banishment of Adam and Eve from the Garden of Eden the “east” came to symbolize distance and exile from the presence of God. Lot would soon find out that being distanced from the divine presence would not lead to divine blessing.
Fortunately, Abram’s response to the conflict did not mirror Lot’s response. For had Abram responded in selfishness as Lot did, the conflict would not have be dealt with in a peaceful manner, and the effectiveness and the testimony of God’s people would have been hindered. Because Abram dealt with the conflict in a manner consistent with the life of faith, he gained a peaceful resolution.

The Life of Faith Gains a Peaceful Resolution

So, Abram and Lot went their separate ways in peace. “So Lot chose for himself all the valley of the Jordan, and Lot journeyed eastward. Thus they separated from each other. Abram settled in the land of Canaan, while Lot settled in the cities of the valley and moved his tents as far as Sodom. Now the men of Sodom were wicked exceedingly and sinners against the Lord” (Genesis 13:11–13).
Can you imagine what the outcome would have been if Abram responded to the conflict in the same manner that Lot did? It would have been disastrous. Had Abram responded with selfish motives, with self-gratification in mind, there might have been a civil war. But Abram trusted the Lord to look out for him, enabling him to look out for Lot and stay at peace.
How did they gain a peaceful resolution? Through separation. There are times when, for the sake of peace, the family of faith needs to separate. If there are disagreements about methods, then separate peacefully and reach people for the cause of Christ. Separation should take place to prevent the church from feuding and warring against one another. Unfortunately, it has been my experience that separation takes place only after feuding and fighting has permeated the family of faith. (Note that I do not use the term “separate” to condone separation between husband and wife—the context here is about unmarried believers within the body of Christ who are not married to each other and who are at odds.)
Abram saw the potential of prolonged conflict; therefore, he took the initiative to bring about a peaceful resolution, and he gained it because he dealt with the conflict in a manner worthy of a life of faith. Abram’s trust in the Lord during conflict would not go unnoticed. For the Lord would affirm his approval of Abram’s faith and trust by showering divine confirmation. “The LORD said to Abram, after Lot had separated from him, ‘Now lift up your eyes and look from the place where you are, northward and southward and eastward and westward; for all the land which you see, I will give it to you and to your descendants forever. I will make your descendants as the dust of the earth, so that if anyone can number the dust of the earth, then your descendants can also be numbered’ ” (Genesis 13:14–18).

The Confirmation upon the Life of Faith (14–16)

Genesis 13:14–18 is set apart by the words, “The Lord said to Abram.” These are words of comfort as well as cause. They are comforting because God is reaffirming his promise to Abram and he is telling us that when we trust in him, even in the midst of conflict, he will take care of his own.
These words of the Lord were also the cause of Abram’s faith. Abram took the Lord at his word; therefore, Abram could give Lot first choice because he had learned what the Lord has said to him when he called him to the life of faith—that God would take care of his needs. Abram could look out for the interests of others because he knew that the Lord would be faithful to fulfill his promises, even when Abram was unfaithful.[11] At this point Abram knew that God meant what he had said, and that it did not matter what choice Lot made because God had enough room in his plan for every man, and God would take care of Abram.[12]
In these verses the Lord reaffirmed his promises to Abram, which he initially gave in Genesis 12:2–3. In reaffirming his promises, notice the stark contrast between Abram and the narrative of Lot in the previous verses.
The Lord said to Abram, “Lift up your eyes and look from the place where you are, northward and southward and eastward and westward; for all the land that you see, I will give it to you and to your descendants forever.” Here, the Lord commanded Abram to lift up his eyes, whereas in the previous verses Lot lifted up his eyes. In this passage, the Lord told Abram to look, whereas in the preceding passage, Lot was the one who saw. Now we read that the Lord gave all the land to Abram, whereas before, Lot chose all the land of the valley. Abram waited for God to take the initiative, Lot simply took his own initiative. Abram waited for God to give him the land, Lot simply took for himself.[13]
It is hard to believe that this is the same Abram who went into Egypt. It is safe to say that this stage of Abram’s journey of faith was successful. It was a period when Abram was tested by inward strife, but instead of his faith faltering it flourished, and the Lord took care of him.

The Communion of the Life of Faith (17–18)

The key to Abram’s flourishing faith is found once again in his communion with the Lord. When Abram walked with and worshipped the Lord, his faith was strong. But when he turned from the Lord and forsook sweet fellowship with the Lord, his faith faltered. Observe Abram’s acts of communion and worship in verses 17 and 18 after God spoke to Abram.
“ ‘Arise, walk about the land through its length and breadth; for I will give it to you.’ Then Abram moved his tent and came and dwelt by the oaks of Mamre, which are in Hebron, and there he built an altar to the Lord.”
In verse 17 the Lord commanded Abram to “arise” and “walk about.” God’s purpose in this command was to remind Abram that he would give Abram and his descendants the land. We also see Abram maintain communion with God through his worship. Verse 18 declares that Abram built an altar to the Lord, a sign of Abram’s devotion and gratitude toward the Lord. It was Abram’s maintained daily communion with the Lord that enabled him to respond to the conflict in a manner consistent with the life of faith. Abram’s daily walk with and worship of the Lord made it possible for him to respond correctly to the conflict with Lot and allowed him to put God first, then others, and finally himself.
A 1970s poet once wrote, “All I ask of life is a constant and exaggerated sense of my own importance.” Obviously ego was in charge of this person’s life. But for one who lives in daily communion with the Lord, our motto should be, “All I ask of life is a constant and exaggerated sense of the importance of trusting the Lord and putting others before myself.” Only one who fully trusts in the Lord can claim this motto.
A father was in his study reading when he overheard his daughter and her friend outside. What began as harmless play suddenly sound like an argument. The conversation between the two girls became heated and argumentative. The father decided it was time to step in, so he opened the window and said, “Stop it. Honey, what’s wrong?” His daughter quickly responded, “But, Daddy, we were just playing church.”[14]
There is no doubt that the family of faith will experience conflict. It takes humility to deal with conflict in a manner consistent with the life of faith. We can cultivate humility only if we individually foster our daily walk with the Lord and reverently worship him. We can also put others before ourselves knowing that the Lord will take care of our every need.


[1]Walton and Matthews 38.
[2]Steward Briscoe, Mastering the Old Testament: Genesis (Dallas: Word Publishing, 1987) 132.
[3]The NET Bible 54.
[4]Michael P. Green, 1500 Illustrations for Biblical Preaching (Grand Rapids: Baker, 1989) 66.
[5]John Phillips, Exploring Genesis (Grand Rapids: Kregel, 1980) 122.
[6]Green 68.
[7]Warren W. Wiersbe, Be Obedient (Colorado Springs: Chariot Victor Publishers, 1991), 28.
[8]Wiersbe 28.
[9]Ross 289.
[10]Waltke 222.
[11]Ross 288.
[12]Ross 288.
[13]Ross 288.
[14]Charles R. Swindoll, The Tale of the Tardy Oxcart (Nashville: Word Publishing, 1998) 95.

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